“May We Make Them Proud” (Part One)

“She’ll Be Fine”; or Mary’s Baby Was Ugly . . . But Not Too Ugly to Live! (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “May We Make Them Proud” [sic] Airdate: February 4, 1980 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: [screams uncontrollably] RECAP: We live in bad times, everybody. We’re down inContinue reading ““May We Make Them Proud” (Part One)”

The King is Dead

Milo Meatloaf; or Charles’s Head is Disappearing Into His Hair (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The King is Dead Airdate: November 12, 1979 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: It’s a clash of the titans when amateur wrestler Jonathan Garvey turns pro. RECAP: First things first, very sad to hearContinue reading “The King is Dead”

The Return of Mr. Edwards

The California Ibex; or Old Dan Fuck Yourself (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Return of Mr. Edwards Airdate: November 5, 1979 Written by Arthur Heinemann Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: A beloved comic-relief character returns to this heartwarming family show and immediately attempts suicide. RECAP:  RAJA: You guys have aContinue reading “The Return of Mr. Edwards”

The Family Tree

Pin a Heart-Shaped Apron to Your Boobs, You’re Sure to Get a Husband; or Walnut Steamy? (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Family Tree Airdate: October 1, 1979 Written by Vincent R. Gutierrez Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: When his biological father surfaces, Albert devises a twisted strategy to getContinue reading “The Family Tree”

“Back to School,” Part Two

Welcome to the Grove, Zaldamo; or Here’s Mud in Your Eye (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “Back to School” [sic], Part Two Airdate: September 24, 1979 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: In the aftermath of the cinnamon-chicken holocaust, Laura gets punked, Nellie gets slimed, and Almanzo gets a knuckleContinue reading ““Back to School,” Part Two”

“Back to School,” Part One

Love is a Manly Splendored Thing; or Flippin’ Awesome (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “Back to School” [sic], Part One Airdate: September 17, 1979 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Walnut Grove experiences an outbreak of immortal TV moments when a grown man named Almanzo Wilder comes to town. RECAP:Continue reading ““Back to School,” Part One”

The Sound of Children

What Could Go Wrong?; or Notice It’s Not “The SIGHT of Children” (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Sound of Children Airdate: February 5, 1979 Written by Carole and Michael Raschella Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Depressing One Alert. Mary and Adam experience the first tragedy in their attempts toContinue reading “The Sound of Children”

Blind Man’s Bluff

Bad Acrobat-itude; or If You Don’t Like That Ending, Blame God (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Blind Man’s Bluff Airdate: January 15, 1979 Written by Arthur Heinemann Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: You may experience déjà vu as the show reimagines a previous episode. See if you can guess which one.Continue reading “Blind Man’s Bluff”

There’s No Place Like Home, Part Two

A Winner Don’t Quit on Themselves, Mr. Hanson; or Little House: The Final Yourney (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: There’s No Place Like Home, Part Two Airdate: October 16, 1978 Written by Michael Landon Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: The three families return to Walnut Grove to find Mr. HansonContinue reading “There’s No Place Like Home, Part Two”

“As Long as We’re Together,” Part One

“Oh, Damn!”; In Which Will’s Singing Voice is Revealed (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “As Long as We’re Together” [sic], Part One Airdate: September 11, 1978 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: After moving to Winoka, Carrie begins using profanity and urinating on the ground. Oh, and Anne Ramsey andContinue reading ““As Long as We’re Together,” Part One”