To Live With Fear: Part One

Night Train to Rochester!; or The Betrayal of Ebenezer Sprague (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: To Live With Fear, Part One Airdate: February 14, 1977 Written by B.W. Sandefur Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: It’s the one where Mary gets kicked by the horse. RECAP: Mary Stories are always occasionsContinue reading “To Live With Fear: Part One”

Quarantine

A Nightmare in Elmsville; or How Many Poison-Ivy Pandemics Can One Town Bear? (a recap by Will Kaiser) TITLE: Quarantine AIRDATE: January 17, 1977 Written by John Hawkins Directed by Victor French SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Southwest Minnesota reels from a twin outbreak of mountain fever and poison ivy. RECAP: We watched this episode outContinue reading “Quarantine”

Blizzard

You Can Tell There’s Going to Be a Big Body Count in This One; or My Smurf is Coming Loose! (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Blizzard Airdate: January 3, 1976 Written by Paul W. Cooper Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: On Christmas Eve, Miss Beadle finally snaps and attempts toContinue reading “Blizzard”

The Bully Boys

Nice to Beat You; or What is This, Straw Dogs? (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Bully Boys Airdate: December 6, 1976 Written by B.W. Sandefur Directed by Victor French SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: When a new family comes to town, Mary and Pa are brutalized, and Ma is molested in the street. ButContinue reading “The Bully Boys”

Fred

When You Assume, It Makes a Goat Out of U and Me; or Charge-in’ Charles (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Fred Airdate: November 29, 1976 Written by Robert Vincent Wright Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Everybody gets an ass-butt from a goat. And, Charles is naked. RECAP: We’ve a specialContinue reading “Fred”

Little Girl Lost

Caaaaarrriiiiiieeeeeeeee!; or She’s Fine, She Can Barely Speak, Same as Always (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Little Girl Lost Airdate: October 18, 1976 Written by Paul W. Cooper Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: It’s the one where Carrie falls in the well. Meanwhile, Mr. Hanson battles an old enemy for theContinue reading “Little Girl Lost”

The Race

Half This Episode is Fat-Shaming Twelve-Year-Olds (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Race Airdate: October 11, 1976 Written by John V. Hanrahan Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Nellie and Laura are the only two contestants in an annual Hero Township-wide horse race, if you can believe that. RECAP: Bummer ofContinue reading “The Race”

Bunny

Fucking Bunny, Man; or Would They Really Hang a Child on This Show? (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Bunny Airdate: October 4, 1976 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Animal abuse escalates the Laura/Nellie war. RECAP: Fucking “Bunny,” man! All hands on deck, let’s do it! We open with aContinue reading “Bunny”

The Collection

The Murder of Mary Ingalls; or He’s Getting Ten Years of Songs Out of This One Episode (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Collection Airdate: September 27, 1976 Written by Arthur Heinemann Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Aldi becomes the victim of kidnapping and identity theft when he encounters some unethicalContinue reading “The Collection”

EXTRA: The 1976 Walnut Groovy Awards

Well, who’da believed it, another season come and gone in the blink of an eye. (Actually, I thought we’d be much further along by now, but oh well.) As you may know, between seasons, we like to revisit the Walnut Groovy Awards . . . to my knowledge the only awards franchise in history thatContinue reading “EXTRA: The 1976 Walnut Groovy Awards”