The Handyman

Caroline Ingalls in Heat; or Unky Chris (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Handyman Airdate: October 3, 1977 Written by Arthur Heinemann Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Ma nearly has an affair with a hunky vagabond until Mary goes berserk and puts a stop to it. (FEATURING A SPECIAL APPEARANCEContinue reading “The Handyman”

The Election

You Mush Vote for Mary; or Will the Real Not-Joni Mitchell Please Stand Up? (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Election Airdate: March 21, 1977 Written by B.W. Sandefur Directed by Victor French SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: A developmentally delayed student gets caught in the crossfire when bullies try to stop Nellie from becomingContinue reading “The Election”

The Music Box

Desire Begets Punishment; or Head Games (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Music Box Airdate: March 14, 1977 Written by Robert Janes Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Nellie engages in psychological warfare, blackmailing Laura and torturing a girl with a speech impediment. Then Laura is hanged to death. In other words,Continue reading “The Music Box”

I─── Kid

EDITOR’S WARNING (HE BEGAN DEFENSIVELY . . .) This recap features semi-fictional characters (at best) who use racist language in the context of a strongly anti-racist storyline and is rated 13+.    Grandpa Stokes is Not Alright; or Life Ain’t Easy for a Boy Named Spotted Eagle (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: I─── Kid Airdate:Continue reading “I─── Kid”

The Bully Boys

Nice to Beat You; or What is This, Straw Dogs? (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Bully Boys Airdate: December 6, 1976 Written by B.W. Sandefur Directed by Victor French SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: When a new family comes to town, Mary and Pa are brutalized, and Ma is molested in the street. ButContinue reading “The Bully Boys”

Troublemaker

Bye Bye Beadie; or Crab-Apple-pocalypse Now (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Troublemaker Airdate: February 25, 1976 Written by John Hawkins Directed by Victor French SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: After the Bead loses a no-confidence vote, a psychopath takes her place. RECAP: Well, after the momentum of “The Runaway Caboose,” our run of good storiesContinue reading “Troublemaker”

Four Eyes

Mary Inglasses; or Four-Eyes Four-Eyes Four-Eyes Mary’s Got Four Eyes Four-Eyes Nyah Nyah Four-Eyes Four-Eyes (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Four Eyes Airdate: September 17, 1975 Written by B.W. Sandefur Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Stupid Mary returns! In this soft launch of the Mary Goes Blind Saga, Mary hidesContinue reading “Four Eyes”

Money Crop

A Harvest of Fudge; or Corn Will Be the Biggest Thing to Hit Walnut Grove Since Typhus! (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Money Crop Airdate: February 19, 1975 Written by Ward Hawkins Story by John Meston Directed by Leo Penn SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Everybody in town turns into an asshole when a niceContinue reading “Money Crop”

School Mom

I Wish I Was Dumb Abel! (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: School Mom Airdate: November 13, 1974 Written by Ward Hawkins Story by Jean Rouverol Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY: Miss Beadle breaks every bone in her body, so Ma subs for her at the school. Possibly better known as “Dumb Abel.” RECAP:Continue reading “School Mom”

Town Party Country Party

Olga Nordstrom’s Lonely Hearts Club Foot (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Town Party Country Party Airdate: October 30, 1974 Written by Juanita Bartlett Directed by Alf Kjellin SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: A hobble-footed girl makes friends with Laura, but her insane father doesn’t want her to have fun. Pa rassles him and he relents.Continue reading “Town Party Country Party”