EXTRA: The 1977 Walnut Groovy Awards

Whew! We’ve finally said goodbye to Season Three. Regular readers know we have a fun between-season tradition; but first, a little explanation might be necessary, since we have picked up some new readers since last year.

It began like this. Some years ago, I attended an auction to disperse the effects of the Thunderbird – a notoriously grand/tacky/racist “theme” hotel, the pride of the seven-county Minneapolis/St. Paul metropolitan area throughout the mid-Twentieth Century. 

The Thunderbird hosted Rotary Club banquets, the Upper Midwest Emmy Awards and crap like that. And, rumor has it, it was also the site of a one-on-one “town hall meeting” – arranged by former Minneapolis Mayor Senator Hubert Humphrey – between President John F. Kennedy and Nancee Parkinson, aka Miss Minnesota 1961. (This blog being above low gossip, I’ll let you further research that subject yourself if you wish.) 

Anyways, in 2016, somebody realized it was the mid-Twentieth Century no longer, and the Thunderbird was demolished; hence the auction.

Well, I came away that day in possession of a “mystery bag” I bid on out of curiosity. Imagine my surprise when I found it to contain a decade’s worth of memorabilia from the so-called “Walnut Groovy Awards” – an awards program presented, in person in the hotel’s Pezihutazizi Ballroom, at the conclusion of each season of Little House’s original TV run! 

Despite considering myself fairly well informed about all things Little House, I had never heard of the Walnut Groovy Awards myself. I’ve since discovered many fans of the show never have either. 

So now, whenever we finish a season, it’s my pleasure to share a few treasures from my goodie bag and revisit the highlights of Little House, year by year.

And without further ado, here are the awards as they were given out in summer 1977!  Oh, but there’s one other thing I should mention: Because the original Star Wars film was released that year, the 1977 Walnut Groovies ceremony had a Star Wars theme.

Yes, I know it seems strange. . . . Hey, it’s not as if I make this stuff up! Truth is just truth, everybody.

BEST STUNT: Charles and Bunny 2 fall down the mountain (“The Hunters”)

Season Three can be read as documenting a brutal war between horses and humans. 

The equines scored by rampaging against the Oleson family and by sending that Four-Eyes know-it-all Mary Ingalls to the ER. 

But the horses were done to even worse – whipped, slashed and slain by barbed wire, and, in the most astonishing stunt of the season, falling down the face of a mountain. 

While the character of that horse died, presumably the horse actor didn’t, and at the very least, it had to hurt. I’m sure I speak for us all in saying I hope the poor creature had a speedy recovery.

Runners-up: Nellie falls off Bunny (“Bunny”), Nellie’s wheelchair goes down the hill (“Bunny”), Mrs. Oleson takes a ride on Sparks (“The Race“), Bunny runs through a barbed-wire fence and dies (“Journey in the Spring”), Fred butts Farmer Parsons through the barn wall (“Fred”), Fred butts Charles (“Fred”), Charles hits George Galender in the face with a chair (“The Bully Boys”), the Smallest Nondescript Helen of Them All gets KO-ed by Bubba Galender (“The Bully Boys”), Mary gets kicked by a horse and bends in half (“To Live With Fear”)

BEST MUSIC: David Rose,“The Music Box”

Like everybody involved with making this show, David outdid himself again and again this season. Which score you think is best is a matter of taste – do you like it robust and rugged? “Gold Country’s” your choice. Soulful and contemplative more your speed? “The Wisdom of Solomon.” A composer for all seasons and moods, truly.

But perhaps his greatest technical accomplishment this year was his title tune for “The Music Box.” Think about it: He not only had to create an original melody that sounded like a familiar old favorite, it also had to be memorable enough for Willie Oleson to torture Laura by SINGING it back to her! David makes shit like that seem easy, but there’s no way it is.  

Runners-up: David Rose (“The Collection,” “Bunny,” “Little Girl Lost,” “The Monster of Walnut Grove,” “The Hunters,” “The Wisdom of Solomon,” “To Live With Fear,” Part One, “The Election,” “Gold Country”)

WORST MUSIC: David Rose (“‘I’ll Ride the Wind’”)

The Rose’s missteps are small and scarcely worth mentioning. Really, the worst he does this season is use “exotic” musical textures to represent Indigenous and Asian characters, and for that you have to blame his times as much as him.

But he also had an off day in “‘I’ll Ride the Wind,’” where at times his incidental music was so oddly chosen Roman asked, “Was David even following the story?” 

Runners-up: David Rose (“The Bully Boys,” “I─── Kid” “To Live With Fear,” Part Two)

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY: Haskell B. Boggs (“Little Girl Lost”)

Having watched this show for most of my life in grainy syndication, it’s been a revelation to me, now watching the high-quality streaming episodes, how bold and beautiful the lighting and color choices really are.

And while the cinematography is always good, on location or not, I’m personally a sucker for the episodes that are deliberately theatrical-looking. Reader Vinícius recently noted how he prefers the “stagier” television of the Twentieth Century, and I suppose I don’t have to tell you I agree with him. 

Of course, not every show was as good at staging those shots as Little House. But when our talented cinematographers really nail it, Little House takes on the feel of a living Rembrandt. “Little Girl Lost” certainly does. 

Runners-up: Haskell B. Boggs (“‘I’ll Ride the Wind,’” “I─── Kid,” “To Live With Fear,” “The Music Box”), Ted Voigtlander (“The Race,” “Journey in the Spring,” “The Hunters,” “Gold Country”)

WORST CINEMATOGRAPHY: N/A

Having done some pondering on the topic, I have to say on Little House, the cinematography is always good.

BEST SCREENPLAY: Robert Janes (“The Music Box”)

The screenplay on Little House is NOTalways good, but this season it almost always was. And the best of all was by a newbie writer, Robert Janes. In “The Music Box,” he plumbs the depths of human nature, turning the rivalry between two small girls into a true Crime and Punishment on the prairie, yet magically getting us to laugh at Laura’s hysterical nightmares too. Nellie becomes as developed at this point as any of the principal characters. A masterpiece. 

Runners-up:  Paul W. Cooper (“Little Girl Lost,” “Blizzard”), Dale Eunson and B.W. Sandefur (“Little Women“), Arthur Heinemann (“The Collection”), Michael Landon (“Journey in the Spring”), Harold Swanton (“The Hunters,” “’I’ll Ride the Wind‘”), Scott Swanton (“The Wisdom of Solomon”), Robert Vincent Wright (“Fred“)

WORST SCREENPLAY: John Hawkins and B.W. Sandefur (“Gold Country”)

Again, there were very few truly bad stories this year, but certainly “Gold Country” at the very least included a number of continuity howlers, from Carl not knowing what a mine looks like despite having helped rescue Carrie from one previously, to Mr. Edwards reading the fucking newspaper! 

Runners-up: John Hawkins (“To Live With Fear,” Part Two)

BEST DIRECTION: Michael Landon (“The Music Box”)

As much as Robert Janes deserves recognition for his superb screenplay, Landon is of course the visionary who brought it to life. And what other director would have been able to get such a wrenching performance out of Katy Kurtzman – at least without somebody calling Child Protective Services?

Runners-up: William F. Claxton (“Blizzard,” “‘I’ll Ride the Wind’”), Victor French (“The Bully Boys”), Michael Landon (“Little Girl Lost,” “The Hunters”)

WORST DIRECTION: Michael Landon (“Journey in the Spring”)

Landon’s episodes are so full of visual and dramatic ideas that it feels strange when they don’t come off. But while this one is as overstuffed as any – with big Father-Vs.-Son conflict, a burning bedroom, gauzy flashbacks, hoboes, the excruciating death of a beloved character, Charles crying over a gigantic gravestone in a lightning storm, and Matthew Labyorteaux – somehow the focus feels off, and in the end we’re left wondering what the hell it was all for.   

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ANIMAL (OR ANIMALS): Ott (Bunny, “Bunny,” “The Race,” “Journey in the Spring”)

I’m not really sure if Ott the horse played Bunny throughout the whole season or just in the namesake story. No matter. This season put poor Bun (and their fans) through the wringer, and I’m sure if there were other Bunny actors, they wouldn’t mind Ott accepting the Groovy award on their behalf.

Runners-up: Barney (Jack, “The Music Box”), Bunny 2 (“The Hunters”), Carrie’s Grasshopper (“Little Girl Lost”), Goatie the Goat (Fred, “Fred”), Sparks the Horse (“The Race”), Tom the Turkey (“Journey in the Spring”)

WORST PERFORMANCE BY AN ANIMAL: Cobber (Random Savage Dog, “Little Women”)

Sure, Cobber the dog looks scary, but if you look closely you can see his tail wagging, and recognize he’s really just a big marshmallow sweetie-pie of a pooch – so sweet he reportedly was considered for the role of Bandit in Season Four.

Runners-up: Alfie/Happy (“The Collection”), Barney (Jack, “To Live With Fear“), Evil Chonky (“To Live With Fear”), The Fly on the Cap’n’s Paddle (“The Music Box”)

MVP GROVESTER: BEST NON-SPEAKING TOWNSPERSON: Pigtail Helen (“The Election”)

After flying under the radar the first couple seasons, Pigtail Helen emerged as a fully articulated unspeaking background character this year when she dropped her pigtail look, perhaps permanently, then stole her friend and/or sister Not-Joni Mitchell’s personality and wardrobe for a single episode.

Runners-up: Ambiguously Ethnic Kid 2 (“I─── Kid,” “Gold Country”), Ancient Lady (Amy Hearn?) (“To Live With Fear”), Cloud City Princess Leia (“To Live With Fear,” “The Wisdom of Solomon”), Not-Joni Mitchell (“The Election”)

WORST NON-SPEAKING TOWNSPERSON: Pigtail Helen (“The Wisdom of Solomon”)

P-Helen also emerged as the worst fully articulated unspeaking background character this year with her look of racist disgust when Solomon Henry correctly answered a question in class.

Runners-up: Hangover Helen (“The Music Box”), Mona Lisa Helen (“The Music Box,” “The Election”)

BEST FEATURED TOWNSPERSON: Hans Dorfler (“The Race”)

Hans Dorfler the blacksmith (I know some of us think of him as “Rubberface Dorfler”), despite featuring in a handful of episodes, isn’t often mentioned when I conduct my surveys of Little House fans’ favorite minor characters. He should be. Yes, he’s slightly dumb and falls asleep in church; but he also has as big a heart as anyone in Walnut Grove (and that’s saying something). Wisely coaching Laura in “The Race,” he’s quite loveable.

Runners-up: Addie Bjornesen (“The Collection”), Mrs. Bowers (“Blizzard”), Henry McGinnis (“Blizzard”), Mustache Man (“The Race”) 

WORST FEATURED TOWNSPERSON: THREE-WAY TIE: The Kid With Very Red Hair (“Little Women,” “I─── Kid,” “The Election”), Mustache Man (“Quarantine,” “I─── Kid”), Ebenezer Sprague (“To Live With Fear”)

A three-way tie might seem excessive. But how to decide between the Kid With Very Red Hair (who bullied/abused Spotted Eagle, Elmer Dobkins, and Willie Oleson), Mustache Man (who not only probably murdered White Buffalo but also pointed a gun at Charles), and Ebenezer Sprague (who skipped town without a word to his “best friend” Laura, or anyone else)? 

Runners-up: Omaha Johnson (“I─── Kid”), Lottie McGinnis (“Blizzard”), The Non-Binary Kid (“The Election”)

BEST PERFORMANCE (GUEST CAST): Todd Bridges (Solomon Henry, “The Wisdom of Solomon”)

With the likes of Burl Ives and Johnny Cash in the competition, you wouldn’t think a little kid would walk away with this one, would you? And yet, Todd Bridges turns in what, in its radiance and perceptiveness, might be the best Little House guest performance ever.

Runners-up: Johnny Cash (Caleb Hodgekiss, “The Collection”), June Carter Cash (Mattie Hodgekiss, “The Collection”),  Don Pedro Colley (Dr. Tane, “The Wisdom of Solomon”), Burl Ives (Sam Shelby, “The Hunters“), Ivy Jones (Amelia, “I─── Kid”), Katy Kurtzman (Anna Gillberg, “The Music Box”), Matthew Labyorteaux (Young Charles, “Journey in the Spring”), Rachel Longaker (Ginny Clark, “Little Women”), Eric Olson (Elmer Dobkins, “The Election”), Kay Peters (The Widow Clark, “Little Women”), Warren Vanders (Harold Mayfield, “Little Women”)

WORST PERFORMANCE (GUEST CAST): E.J. André (Old Zachariah, “Gold Country”)

Interestingly, the memorabilia goodie bag I got contained a complete transcript of E.J. André’s acceptance speech for this award, which I here reproduce verbatim:

AAAAAAAAARRRGGGHH! Can’t you see I got my APPLE BACK!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGHH! GET OUT!!! GET OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUT!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Hard to follow that up with anything. I will say, however, that André is fast becoming my favorite bad Little House actor of all time.

Runners-up: Don “Red” Barry (Rufe Parsons, “Fred”), Arthur Hill (Lansford Ingalls, “Journey in the Spring”), George Murdock (Jeremy Stokes, “I─── Kid”), Jan Sterling (Laura Colby Ingalls, “Journey in the Spring”)

BEST MAKEUP (SPECIAL AWARD): Allan “Whitey” Snyder, “The Monster of Walnut Grove”

A number of special awards this year. First, Little House’s beloved makeup artist Whitey Snyder is recognized for his work on the spooktacular “Monster of Walnut Grove,” in which his designs paid tribute to several horror icons of the past.

BEST HAIR (SPECIAL AWARD): Larry Germain, “‘I’ll Ride the Wind,’” “Little Women,” “To Live With Fear“

Another key player, hairstylist Larry Germain, reached new heights this season, with Teen/Tiger Beat styles for Mary and John, an uproarious wig for Nellie’s acting debut, and a new look for Caroline that Dagny (quite accurately) described as “a Playboy Magazine cover from 1977.”

BEST MINNESOTA ACCENT (SPECIAL AWARD): Willie Aames (Seth Johnson, “I─── Kid”)

You almost never hear cast members on this show actually attempt accents from our part of the Midwest, but this year Willie Aames was an exception, and he did an okay job at it, too.

Runner-up: Mona Lisa Helen (“The Bully Boys”)

BEST PERFORMANCE BY A SEVERED HEAD (SPECIAL AWARD): Katherine MacGregor (“The Monster of Walnut Grove”)

Unexpectedly competitive category, huh? As great as the other heads were, they can’t compare to the unforgettable image of Katherine MacG snuggled into a platter of boiled carrots and potatoes.

Runners-up: Lorraine (“Gold Country”), Not-Mrs. Oleson (“The Monster of Walnut Grove”)

BEST PERFORMANCE WITHIN A PERFORMANCE (SPECIAL AWARD): Alison Arngrim (Nellie Oleson as Meg March, “Little Women”)

“Acting acting” is another difficult assignment – but not for very good actor Alison Arngrim, who makes very bad actor Nellie Oleson’s performance as Meg one for the ages. 

BEST CRYING (SPECIAL AWARD): Michael Landon (various)

Who am I kidding, Landon could win this one every year. But he achieved a personal record in Season Three, where by my count he shed tears three times per episode, on average. 

WORST CRYING (SPECIAL AWARD): Various (“Gold Country”)

Perhaps because “Gold Country” didn’t quite hit its emotional targets, a number of cast members needed a little help getting into the moment. 

Either that, or Landon noticed a glue bottle was about to expire and figured it was a shame to waste it.

BEST PERFORMANCE (RECURRING CAST): TIE: Alison Arngrim (“The Music Box”), Charlotte Stewart (“Little Girl Lost,” “Blizzard,” “Little Women”) 

As I mentioned at one point, this season had so many fine performances that choosing the “best” from amongst them is really a thankless task. That said, two of our regular cast members stood out.

In the recap for “The Music Box,” I wondered if Landon realized what a wonderful investment he’d made when he hired Arngrim to play Nellie. In this story, the actor uses her considerable powers to express the character’s fundamental sadness and self-loathing – characteristics that elevate her above the simple cardboard villain she could have been.

And while Miss Beadle didn’t really get a proper story of her own this season, Charlotte Stewart stole at least three episodes, showing that both tragedy and comedy were effortless for her.

Runners-up: Alison Arngrim (“Bunny”), Bonnie Bartlett (“‘I’ll Ride the Wind,’”), Richard Bull (“Bunny,” “The Monster of Walnut Grove”), Victor French (“‘I’ll Ride the Wind,’” “To Live With Fear”), Dabbs Greer (“The Collection”), Katherine MacGregor (“Bunny,” “The Music Box”), Karl Swenson (“Little Girl Lost”)

WORST PERFORMANCE (RECURRING CAST): Radames Pera (“‘I’ll Ride the Wind’”)

Again, hard to fault poor Radames when most likely it was the lack of chemistry between him and MSA that doomed John Junior (literally!). Still, if this episode was the test to see if the character would endure, he failed it.

LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD: Brian Part (Carl Sanderson), Ted Gehring (Ebenezer Sprague)

Bonnie Bartlett, Radames Pera and Kyle Richards would all return to the show the Sanderson-Edwardses again (Richards will play another character, too). But while Carl will eventually be back, he’ll be played by someone else. That’s a pity, because nobody could play this lovable if slightly blockheaded character as well as Brian Part, and as the first regular cast member to depart the series permanently, it’s only fitting that he receive special recognition.

While this season ends with the shock news that Mr. Sprague blew town, and while the character will be mentioned again a few times down the road, Season Three marked the last onscreen appearance of the character. We all love Sprague (especially Dagny) and Ted Gehring’s complex portrayal of him, and we’ll miss him for seasons to come.

BEST PERFORMANCE (MAIN CAST): TIE: Karen Grassle (“The Bully Boys”), Michael Landon (“The Hunters”)

Close readers will have noticed I’m a little hot-and-cold on Grassle’s acting, which seems distractingly all-over-the-place to me. That said, when she gets the right material, she knocks it out of the park, and that’s certainly true when Caroline is assaulted by the Galenders in “The Bully Boys.” Grassle is devastating here, and she makes Ma’s shame and inner struggle after the incident absolutely unforgettable.

But so is Landon himself. “The Hunters” shows him at his best, as Pa lies on the ground, praying to God not to let him die in front of his daughter. 

Runners-up: Melissa Sue Anderson (“The Collection,” “‘I’ll Ride the Wind,’” “To Live with Fear”), Melissa Gilbert (“Bunny,” “The Hunters,” “The Music Box”), Karen Grassle (“Gold Country”), Michael Landon (“Journey in the Spring,” “The Bully Boys,” “I─── Kid,” “To Live With Fear,” “The Wisdom of Solomon”)

WORST PERFORMANCE (MAIN CAST): N/A

Even Carrie was good a few times! Well, almost.

Now for the big awards, both good and bad.

FIVE BEST STORIES:

#5: Blizzard

Epic and iconic, “Blizzard” features a tight, smart script that proves you don’t need a huge budget to pack an hour’s worth of TV full of drama and terror.

#4: Little Women

Little House is touch-and-go when it comes to outright comedy, but “Little Women” is a hilarious triumph, with just the right amount of poignancy and a fantastic contribution by Miss Charlotte. Charles wasn’t the only one crying with laughter by the end. 

#3: Bunny

For many, this is the ultimate Little House story – exciting, a little dark, and very funny. Nellie’s early experiments with emotional blackmail are satisfying, but not nearly as much as the hilarious revenge Laura exacts on her. 

#2: The Music Box

I’ve said it before, but in my view this is about as perfect as Little House gets, with suspense, depth of characterization, and plenty of wit, not to mention stunning performances from the three young principal actors.

#1: The Hunters

While “The Hunters” might not have cleaned up in the individual categories, it’s easy to see why it was a hit with the Academy. Shot in an “epic cinema” style, it has a sweep and scope that feels beyond our usual stories. And while Burl Ives and Johnny Crawford are good, primarily this is The Charles and Laura Show at its best . . . and that means Little House on the Prairie at its best.

FIVE WORST STORIES:

#5: The Election

We all actually liked this episode, which gives you an indication of Season Three’s overall strength. But the consensus was that, strong as “The Election” is, other stories pulled the same themes off better.

#4: Journey in the Spring

The horror of Bunny’s death is bad enough on its own, but the main problem we had was with Lansford Ingalls himself. We debated whether it was more the way the character was written or acted, but whatever it was, “Journey in the Spring” pretty much bombed in our house.

The best thing Olive could find to say about it was, “At least they didn’t have a scene where Nellie laughs about Bunny dying. That would be too much.”

#3: “‘I’ll Ride the Wind’”

They say romance is dead among young people today, and if our kids’ reaction to Mary and John’s love story-proper is any indication, they’re right. 

#2: Gold Country

My personal pick for the season’s worst, this one was saved from the very barrel-bottom by Dagny, who’s a sucker for E.J. André and his crazy shenanigans.

#1: To Live With Fear

I don’t have to tell you that if we were judging Part One alone, this story would have a much higher ranking. But the Walnut Groovy Academy has its rules, and the disappointment of a Dying-Mary episode that doesn’t even really focus on Dying Mary doomed this two-parter to last place.

And as always, for your consideration and pleasure, here’s the full list of our family’s aggregated rankings. See you back here for Season Four.

1. The Hunters 
2. The Music Box 
3. Bunny 
4. Little Women 
5. Blizzard 
6. The Wisdom of Solomon
7. The Bully Boys 
8. The Monster of Walnut Grove
9. Quarantine 
10. Fred 
11. Little Girl Lost 
12. The Race
13. I─── Kid
14. The Collection 
15. The Election 
16. Journey in the Spring
17. “I’ll Ride the Wind” 
18. Gold Country
19. To Live With Fear