EXTRA: The 1978 Walnut Groovy Awards

Some of you may recall that between seasons, I like to share historical artifacts from the Walnut Groovy Awards, a ceremony held every summer during Little House’s original run that recognized the cast and crew’s outstanding achievements for the year. (It is from this annual event that our blog takes its name.)

My collection of memorabilia from the “Groovies” came to me in an interesting way. Years ago, I received notice from a Minneapolis law firm that an uncle of mine had died and left me a legacy. (I have no memory of this uncle, though apparently I met him as a small child.)

My original impression was that my inheritance would be quite a large one, but unfortunately my uncle’s estate was eaten up by debts, blah blah blah, and all that remained was a single box. 

Inside that box, reader, were photographs and programs from the Walnut Groovy Awards, which were held each year in the Pezihutazizi Ballroom of The Thunderbird Hotel, an iconic if tasteless Indigenous-themed establishment in the south suburbs of Minneapolis that was destroyed in a fire (or something) about ten years ago. 

Someone (my uncle?) had helpfully circled the winners, making it easy for the amateur historian to piece together both sequence and outcomes in all categories. And it is my pleasure to share these recreations with you.

So with all respect to Melissa Sue Anderson, I say Emmys Schmemmys! Let’s go to the 1978 Groovies!

BEST STUNT: Carrie and Mary fall on their faces (“The Wolves“) 

For a Little House fan, it don’t get much better than this. Clearly unintentional, this colossal wreck was nevertheless captured on film, and Landon wisely put it to use.

Legend has it somebody put Carrie’s shoes on the wrong feet that day. That story may be too good to be true, but whatever the reason, we’re the richer for it.

Runners-up: Reverend Alden gets hit in the face with a Bible (“’My Ellen‘”), Jonathan Garvey catches on fire (“The High Cost of Being Right”), Laura runs and skips rope at the same time (“Freedom Flight”), Mary trips over the chair (“‘I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”), Mrs. Oleson and Nels fall off the horse (“’Here Come the Brides’”), Patrick saves Carrie from the balloon (“‘Meet Me at the Fair‘”), the Second Banana Pointer dog leaps the chicken-coop fence (“The Wolves”)

BEST MUSIC: TIE: David Rose (“’My Ellen,’” “‘Here Come the Brides’”)

These two scores illustrate the Range of the Rose. “’My Ellen’” features writing for the upper strings that’s worthy of Hitchcock and Herrmann, and that contributes tremendously to the terror of the story. 

And “‘Here Comes the Brides’” is David’s wittiest score to date, with sly allusions to Mozart and Wagner reflecting the story’s theme (viz., love) and heightening the comedy. Simply brilliant. 

Runners-up: David Rose (“Castoffs,” “The Handyman,” “The Wolves,” “To Run and Hide,” “The High Cost of Being Right,” “The Fighter,” “‘I Remember, I Remember,’” “Be My Friend,” “The Stranger,” “’I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”)

WORST MUSIC: David Rose (“‘Meet Me at the Fair‘”)

Purely subjective, but I can’t stand the balloon theme in “‘Meet Me at the Fair’” (not so affectionately known as “Mehwwy in the Sky with Diamonds”). Like nails on a chalkboard.

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY: TIE: Ted Voigtlander (“The Wolves,” “Freedom Flight,” “‘Be My Friend’”)

There are a lot of ties this season, which I don’t have to tell you was a strong one. But while I’ve never seen a badly filmed Little House episode, these three stories stand out. The sun-dappled, almost magical forest in “‘Be My Friend,’” the gorgeous vistas in “Freedom Flight,” and most impressively the terrifying dog pack in “The Wolves” show off what a simple TV camera could capture in 1978.

Runners-up: Haskell B. Boggs (“‘Meet Me at the Fair,‘” “‘Here Come the Brides’”), Ted Voigtlander (“Castoffs,” “‘My Ellen,'” “The High Cost of Being Right,” “The Stranger”)

BEST SCREENPLAY: John T. Dugan (“‘Here Come the Brides’”)

To date, our family has been lukewarm on the comedic stories focused on the Olesons and their misadventures. But we laughed our heads off at this one, which pulls off the miracle of being simultaneously warm, funny, insightful, and even a little shocking. A treasure.

Runners-up:  Ron Chiniquy and Richalene Kelsay (“Freedom Flight”), John T. Dugan (“The Creeper of Walnut Grove”), John Hawkins (“Whisper Country”), Arthur Heinemann (“The Handyman”), Lawrence (M.) Konner (“The Wolves”), Michael Landon (“‘My Ellen,'” “The Fighter,” “‘Be My Friend’”), Carole and Michael Raschella (“Times of Change,” “A Most Precious Gift,” “’I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”) 

WORST SCREENPLAY: Don Balluck (“The Aftermath”) 

No one behaves believably in this story, which papers over the Civil War and sees our band of merry Grovesters helping brutal murderers escape justice. 

Runners-up: Don Balluck (“The High Cost of Being Right”), John T. Dugan (“To Run and Hide,” “The Rivals”), Arthur Heinemann (“The Inheritance”)

SKEEVIEST SCREENPLAY (SPECIAL AWARD): John T. Dugan (“The Rivals”)

There were a few contenders for the prize this year; but a plot focused on pubescent body development feels weird for Little House, and the script, written by a late-middle-aged man, doesn’t have much authenticity.

Runners-up: Arthur Heinemann (“The Handyman”), Michael Landon (“‘Be My Friend’”)

BEST DIRECTION: William F. Claxton (“The Handyman”)

“The Handyman” is also skeevy-ish, but shows that artful handling can transcend prurience to achieve something beautiful. Good old Clax captures the tensions of this story quite painfully, and brings out two perfect performances from Anderson and Grassle.

Runners-up: William F. Claxton (“Times of Change,” “‘Here Come the Brides,’” “’I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”), Michael Landon (“Castoffs,” “‘My Ellen,'” “The Wolves,” “The High Cost of Being Right,” “The Fighter,” “Freedom Flight,” “‘Be My Friend’”)

WORST DIRECTION: Michael Landon (“Whisper Country”)

I know this one is a fan favorite, and I love it too. But it is weird to the point of implausibility, and while the horror tone is intense, it’s also off-brand. “Whisper Country” is arguably one time Landon leaned too far into his dark imagination, and the result is more campy than classic.

Runner-up: William F. Claxton (“The Aftermath”)

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ANIMAL (OR ANIMALS): Jeffrey (Bandit, “The Wolves”) 

It’s a running joke in our house how much Dagny prefers Bandit to Jack (she chose “Castoffs” as her #1 story this year purely because it kills off the latter), but in truth both dogs turned in good performances this season. Nothing, however, can top the wild-goose chase on which Bandit leads the chief of the ferocious dog pack. A great animal character, a thrilling moment, and a terrific performance by newcomer Jeffrey. 

Runners-up: Jack/Barney (Jack, “Castoffs”), The Mutant Ducks (“The Inheritance”), “The Granddaddy of All Frogs” (“The Rivals,” “‘Be My Friend’”), Hamburger Jackson the Cow (“The Wolves”), Veal Chop Jackson the Calf (“The Wolves”), Jeffrey (Bandit, “Castoffs”), Parrot Polly (himself, with voice by Michael Landon, “Castoffs,”“The Handyman” ), Not-Nyssa the Tony Soprano Dog (“The Wolves”), Dead Sheep #2 (“The Wolves”), the Second Banana Pointer (“The Wolves”), Spot the Cow (“The Handyman”), the White Butterfly (“The Handyman”), the Worm Laura Screams at in “‘Be My Friend’” (“‘Be My Friend’”)

WORST PERFORMANCE BY AN ANIMAL (OR ANIMALS): Dr. Logan’s Taxidermy Collection (“To Run and Hide”)

It seems like overkill to accuse dead animals of lifeless performances. But something tells me they won’t mind. 

MVP GROVESTER: BEST NON-SPEAKING TOWNSPERSON: Philomena Varnum (“‘Here Come the Brides’”)

Okay, so she’s actually from Sleepy Eye, not the Grove, but Justice of the Peace Varnum’s rice-throwing wife steals the show – even in a story brimming with hilarious performances.

Runners-up: Mrs. Foster (“The Handyman”), The Non-Binary Kid (“To Run and Hide”), Attendees of the Redwood County Fair (“‘Meet Me at the Fair’”) 

WORST NON-SPEAKING TOWNSPERSON: TIE: The French Maitre D’-Looking Grovester, Not-Richard Libertini (“The High Cost of Being Right”)

These two, you recall, didn’t lift a finger to help their friend and neighbor Jonathan Garvey when he was attacked by card cheats in Mankato’s Shamrock Saloon. Not cool, guys! 

BEST FEATURED TOWNSPERSON: Benjamin the Youngish Whitish Grovester (“Freedom Flight”)

Despite riding a horse at top speed and having several lines (including the wonderful “Then what in the heck are THEM?”), Benjamin does not receive a credit. That’s a pity, because it’s a memorable performance. Benjamin, the Walnut Groovy Academy salutes you – whoever you are.

Runners-up: Carl the Flunky (“To Run and Hide”), Jenny the Burton Blind School Student (“‘I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”), Mrs. Whipple (“To Run and Hide”)

WORST FEATURED TOWNSPERSON: TIE: Carl the Flunky, Mustache Man (“Freedom Flight”) 

It broke my heart that core Grovester twosome Carl and Mustache Man, so often aligned with our heroes, turned savage (the term fits) when Dakota people came looking for medical aid. 

Runners-up: The Kid with Very Red Hair (Mean One) (“‘My Ellen’“), The Kid with Very Red Hair’s Younger Brother with Very Red Hair (aka Peeping Tommy) (“‘My Ellen,'” “The Stranger”), Jud Lar[r]abee (“The Wolves”), Mustache Man (“The Wolves”), Slade the Bounty Hunter (“The Aftermath”)

BEST MAKEUP (SPECIAL AWARD): Allan “Whitey” Snyder (“The Fighter”)

The characters on this show don’t wear much makeup, so Allan “Whitey” Snyder’s magical art is usually subtle. But occasionally he gets to tackle a more dramatic look for a story. Joe Kagan’s horrific bruises in “The Fighter” are so real, it hurts to look at them.

Runners-up: Allan “Whitey” Snyder (“The Aftermath,” “The High Cost of Being Right,” “‘I Remember, I Remember’”)

GROOVIEST FACES (SPECIAL AWARD): Patrick Labyorteaux (Andrew Garvey, “The Fighter,” “The Inheritance”)

Andy made a likable addition to the series this season, and some of his goofy looks deserve special celebration.

Runners-up: Katherine MacGregor (Mrs. Oleson, “To Run and Hide,” “‘Here Come the Brides,’” “The Inheritance”), Eddie Quillan (Judge Picker, “The High Cost of Being Right”)

BEST FLAILING (SPECIAL AWARD): Hersha Parady (Alice Garvey, “The High Cost of Being Right”)

Karen Grassle and Charlotte Stewart have battled for supremacy in this category the last few seasons. But this time around, they got fierce competition from Hersha Parady, who more than held her own.

Runners-up: Jonathan Gilbert (Willie, “The Stranger”), Melissa Gilbert (“‘I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away’“), Robert “Rob” Kenneally (Seth Barton, “‘I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”)

WORST DRUNK ACTING (SPECIAL AWARD): TIE: Richard Bull (Nels, “Castoffs”), Katherine MacGregor (Mrs. Oleson, “To Run and Hide”)

Impossible to choose between these two for this award. While entertaining, their takes on intoxication don’t exactly bring “realism” to mind.

BIGGEST HAIR (MALE) (SPECIAL AWARD): Michael Mullins (Bobbie Harris, “‘Be My Friend’”)

I have no idea what they did to men’s hair in the 1970s to make it so huge. When I was young in the 1990s and still had hair, I wore it long; but it never resembled the crazy manes we get on this show. Just when you thought Charles and Young Charles took the cake, Bobbie Harris came along and raised the bar. If the hair gets bigger next season, some characters won’t be able to fit through doors.

Runners-up: Matthew Labyorteaux (Young Charles, “‘I Remember, I Remember’”), Michael Landon (Charles, various)

BEST PERFORMANCE BY NIPPLES AND CHEST VEINS (SPECIAL AWARD): Michael Landon (Charles, “Castoffs”)

There was some competition in this category this year, but Landon is still the reigning champ.

Runner-up: Moses Gunn (Joe Kagan, “The Fighter”)

BEST BACK MUSCLES (SPECIAL AWARD): Merlin Olsen (Jonathan Garvey, “The High Cost of Being Right”)

At times this season, the show seemed a little fixated on men’s bodies. Former defensive tackle Merlin Olsen took the prize in the “viewed from behind” contest.

Runners-up: Moses Gunn (Joe Kagan, “The Fighter”), Nick Ramus (Little Crow, “Freedom Flight”)

BIGGEST PENIS IN THE HISTORY OF 7+ CHILDREN’S PROGRAMMING (SPECIAL AWARD): Moses Gunn (Joe Kagan, “The Fighter”)

If you’ve seen the episode, no explanation is required for this one.

Runner-up: The Well-Endowed Boxer (“The Fighter”)

MOST MYSTERIOUS ABSENCE (SPECIAL AWARD): Melissa Gilbert (Laura, “To Run and Hide”)

Where was everybody this season? All sorts of regular characters disappeared when you MOST expected them. Mrs. Oleson didn’t butt in when bounty hunters took over the town, and Mr. Hanson skipped the meeting about the presence of Sioux warriors nearby. 

Perhaps the weirdest example was Laura’s absence from “To Run and Hide” – made more noticeable when we saw Mary and Carrie wandering Hero Township without her multiple times. No explanation was given. What’s up with that?

Runners-up: Melissa Sue Anderson (Mary, “The High Cost of Being Right”), Melissa Gilbert (Laura, “Whisper Country”), Karen Grassle (Caroline, “‘Here Come the Brides’”), Lindsay and Sidney Greenbush (Carrie, “The High Cost of Being Right”), Michael Landon (Charles, “‘Here Come the Brides’”), Katherine MacGregor (Mrs. Oleson, “The Aftermath”), Karl Swenson (Mr. Hanson, “To Run and Hide,” “Freedom Flight”)

TINIEST PERFORMANCE TO RECEIVE A CREDIT (SPECIAL AWARD): Michelle Downey, (Sarah Miller, “Whisper Country”)

Similarly, this year several actors received credits for non-speaking or barely speaking roles. (If you can quote young Hazel’s single line in “Whisper Country” without looking it up, I’ll buy you a Coke.)

Possibly the smallest performance, though, was given (in the same story) by Michelle Downey as Sarah Miller, who literally just stands there looking dismal while the rest of the story carries on without her.  

Runners-up: Melissa Sue Anderson (Mary, “The Stranger”), Jennifer Brill (Hazel the Little Dunce, “Whisper Country”), Stephen Coit (Mr. Tate, Olaf Lundstrom’s Side-Standing Secretary, “The Stranger”), Gregg Forrest (Henry Odin Quiner Holbrook, “‘I Remember, I Remember’”), Melissa Gilbert (Laura, “The Aftermath”), Robin Muir (Polly Ingalls, “‘I Remember, I Remember’”), Henry Wills (Turner the Bounty Hunter, “The Aftermath”), Kristi Jill Wood (Eliza Ann Quiner Holbrook, “‘I Remember, I Remember”’)

MOST SATISFYING MIDDLE-AGED MAN REDEMPTION (SPECIAL AWARD): Ebenezer Sprague (“‘I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”)

I’ll be the first to admit, I had to eat crow. For nearly a full year, I bitched about how Mr. Sprague abandoned his friends to their fates by fleeing town in the dark of night. Well, I should have consulted the Groovy archive, because the Academy recognized the character with a special award celebrating his return. Hats off, Mr. S!

Runners-up: Joe Kagan (“The Fighter“), Olaf Lundstrom (“The Stranger“)

BEST PERFORMANCE BY FOOD (SPECIAL AWARD): Laura’s apple boobs (“The Rivals”)

This was really a no-contest this year.

Runners-up: Doc Baker’s apples (“To Run and Hide”), the apple “et” by Joshua Bond (“Whisper Country“) (a lotta apples this year), the escargot à la François (“The Rivals”), Mary’s baked potato (“‘I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”), Mary’s roast beef (“’I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”)

Now for the big acting prizes.

BEST PERFORMANCE (GUEST CAST): TIE: Linwood Boomer (Adam Kendall, “’I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”), Moses Gunn (Joe Kagan, “The Fighter”), Katy Kurtzman (Young Caroline, “‘I Remember, I Remember’”)

On the other hand, this was a very competitive category this season, resulting in a three-way tie. Linwood Boomer made an immediate impression as Adam, with a performance that’s intelligent, compassionate, and full of life.

Moses Gunn broke hearts as the noble and tragic Joe Kagan, who despite his fame suffers from low self-esteem and who gives up his family for their own good. His sorta-reconciliation with his estranged son was rewarding, and Gunn’s acting was beautiful.

And Katy Kurtzman, so memorable as the poor stuttering kid in “The Music Box” last year, made us forget that role with her eerily perfect take on Young Caroline.

Runners-up: Don “Red” Barry (Jud Lar[r]abee, “The Wolves”), Joshua Bryant (Adam Simms, “‘Here Come the Brides’”), Corinne Camacho (Eloise Taylor, “My Ellen“), Dee Croxton (Ellen Fisher, “Whisper Country”), Ivor Francis (Judge Varnum, “‘Here Come the Brides’”), Gil Gerard (Chris Nelson, “The Handyman”), Ken Johnson (Busby, “’My Ellen’”), Robert “Rob” Kenneally (Seth Barton, “‘I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”), Ketty Lester (Janie Kagan, “The Fighter”), Bob Marsic (Luke Simms, “‘Here Come the Brides’”), Lenora May (Anna Mears, “‘Be My Friend’”), Michael Morgan (Patrick, “‘Meet Me at the Fair’”), Michael Mullins (Bobbie Harris, “‘Be My Friend’”), Mark Neely (Joshua Bond, “Whisper Country”), John Bennett Perry (Frank James, “The Aftermath”), Nehemiah Persoff (Olaf Lundstrom, “The Stranger”), Ford Rainey (Dr. Burke, “‘I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”), Nick Ramus (Little Crow, “Freedom Flight”), Lisa Reeves (Miss Lawrence, “Times of Change”), Dennis Rucker (Jesse James, “The Aftermath”), Raymond St. Jacques (L. Moody, “The Fighter”), Paula Shaw (Angela the Prostitute, “Times of Change“), Lili Valenty (Madam Maria, “A Most Precious Gift”), Collin Wilcox (Beth Novack, “To Run and Hide”)

WORST PERFORMANCE (GUEST CAST): Allan Rich (Otto Ripley, “The Inheritance”)

There were few really terrible performances from guest actors this year. Allan Rich’s overacted Missouri journalist was probably the worst.

Runners-up: Burr DeBenning (Dr. Logan, “To Run and Hide”), Dick DeCoit (Cass McCray, “‘Meet Me at the Fair‘”), Tony Markes (Bob Ford, “The Aftermath”), John McLiam (Caleb Fisher, “Whisper Country”), Richard O’Brien (Hugh MacGregor, “Freedom Flight”), Cicely Walper (Grandmama Caldwell, “The Stranger”)

CRAZIEST GOOD/BAD PERFORMANCE (GUEST CAST) (SPECIAL AWARD): Anita Dangler (Miss Peel, “Whisper Country”)

Reviving this one after a couple years’ hiatus. After all, the category might have been invented to honor Anita Dangler and her unique take on Little House’s favorite Christian extremist.

Runners-up: Sandy McPeak (Jacob Bond, “Whisper Country”), Donald Moffat (Nathaniel Mears, “‘Be My Friend’”), Michael Pataki (Stanley Novack, “To Run and Hide”)

BEST PERFORMANCE (RECURRING CAST): TIE: Richard Bull (“‘Here Come the Brides’”), Katherine MacGregor (“‘Here Come the Brides’”)

Once again, this category had so many candidates that choosing would be next to impossible. But the Academy rewarded the inimitable Katherine MacGregor and her less flashy counterpart Richard Bull for their contributions to the funniest story of the season.

Runners-up: Alison Arngrim (“‘Here Come the Brides’”), Hermione Baddeley (“Castoffs,” “The Handyman”), Richard Bull (“The Fighter,” “The Stranger”), Jonathan Gilbert (“The Stranger”), Dabbs Greer (“’My Ellen,’” “The Inheritance,” “’I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”), Kevin Hagen (“The Fighter”), Patrick Labyorteaux (“The High Cost of Being Right,” “The Fighter,” “The Inheritance”), Katherine MacGregor (“’My Ellen,’” “The Creeper of Walnut Grove,” “To Run and Hide,” “The Inheritance”), Merlin Olsen (“’My Ellen,’” “The Wolves,” “The High Cost of Being Right,” “A Most Precious Gift,” “‘I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”), Hersha Parady (“The High Cost of Being Right”), Radames Pera (“Times of Change”), Charlotte Stewart (“‘Here Come the Brides,’” “The Rivals,” “A Most Precious Gift,” “‘I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”), Karl Swenson (“The Fighter“)

WORST PERFORMANCE (RECURRING CAST): Dabbs Greer (“The Aftermath”)

Dabbs Greer can hardly be accused of being a bad actor, but his pompous Alden sure adds to “The Aftermath’s” absurdity and implausibility.

LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD: Charlotte Stewart (Miss Beadle), Radames Pera (John Sanderson, Jr.), Queenie Smith (Mrs. Whipple)

There wasn’t a dry eye in the Academy when our beloved Bead said her goodbye in “‘I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away.'” So long and many thanks to Charlotte Stewart, in whose capable hands the character was never merely “supporting.”

While John Junior the character crashed and burned spectacularly this season, Radames Pera’s fantastic performances in several stories (notably “His Father’s Son“) were a wonderful and unique contribution to the show and its legacy. Bravo, celeste Radames.

And we mustn’t forget the adorable Queenie Smith, who passed away in 1978 and who was shall we say nearly miraculous in her performance as the Whip (sorry). Her performance in “Soldier’s Return” is a Little House essential.

BEST PERFORMANCE (MAIN CAST): TIE: Melissa Sue Anderson (“The Handyman”), Melissa Gilbert (“‘My Ellen’“), Karen Grassle (“A Most Precious Gift“), Michael Landon (“’I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”)

The Groovies have never had a four-way tie before, and yet, with such strong performances by our principals, how could it be otherwise? (Sorry, Carries 1 and 2.) 

Melissa Sue Anderson was recognized with an Emmy nomination for “’I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away,’” but for my money her best work of the season came in “The Handyman.” A touchstone of Mary’s coming of age, the story shows us aspects of the character not seen before, as Mary the young woman recognizes troubling things Mary the girl would have missed.

Melissa Gilbert, meanwhile, knocked it out of the park several times. “’My Ellen’” gives us a more mature depiction of Laura than we’ve had before. The character must think her way out of a terrifying situation – and she emerges a different person afterward.

Karen Grassle also gave several notable performances, but Ma’s heartsickness and shock when her pregnancy creates a barrier with Pa can’t be bested.

And Michael Landon, acting (as our commentators observed) even with his snot, captures a terrified Charles we’ve never seen – no small feat, considering how often the character weeps. 

Runners-up: Melissa Sue Anderson (“The Wolves,” “Whisper Country,” “’I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away’”), Melissa Gilbert (“Castoffs,” “The Wolves,” “The Rivals,” “‘Be My Friend,’” “’I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away‘”), Karen Grassle (“The Handyman,” “The Fighter,” “The Rivals,” “‘I Remember, I Remember,’” “The Inheritance,” “A Most Precious Gift”), Lindsay and Sidney Greenbush (“’My Ellen,’” “‘Meet Me at the Fair,'” “A Most Precious Gift”), Michael Landon (“Times of Change,” “‘Be My Friend,’” “The Inheritance,” “A Most Precious Gift”)

WORST PERFORMANCE (MAIN CAST): Melissa Sue Anderson (“The Aftermath”)

In my view, things are very off about “The Aftermath,” and that includes MSA’s acting, which, when combined with the sketchy writing, makes Mary seem like a fool rather than the canny problem-solver we all know and (mostly) love.

Runners-up: Melissa Sue Anderson (“‘Meet Me at the Fair‘”), Karen Grassle (“Times of Change,” “The Aftermath”)

Now for the best of the best and the worst of the worst!

FIVE BEST STORIES:

#5: “Here Come the Brides“

A sparkling comedy that treats one of the show’s most complicated characters with surprising grace, “‘Here Come the Brides'” is a pleasure from beginning to end.

#4: “My Ellen“

This one’s been the sentimental favorite of our family for a long time. A (mostly) dark and terrifying tale, it nevertheless ends on a welcome note of forgiveness and compassion. A true classic.

#3: The Handyman

My personal favorite of the season, this one is a strikingly grown-up exploration of middle-aged desire, temptation, and responsibility, and features a knockout performance by Melissa Sue Anderson.

#2: The Wolves

This action-packed thriller brings something gritty and new to the series format, with electric results. A nail-biter for sure.

#1: “I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away“

This might seem like a gimme, but “‘Waving'” captures so many emotions so perfectly. It more than deserves its reputation as one of the greatest-ever Little House stories.

FIVE WORST STORIES:

#5: The Aftermath

Not much more to be said about this one. I know some of you disagree and that’s fine, but for me this is probably the most baffling story we’ve had so far.

#4: The Inheritance

One of those Little House episodes where the characters all act like they dropped their brains down the privy.

#3: The Creeper of Walnut Grove

I like this one, myself, but the Academy found its central Harriet the Spy gimmick too thin to sustain a whole episode.

#2: “Meet Me at the Fair“

Another harsh choice, in my view, but what do I know. Certainly this one is silly AF, the Mary love-triangle story is pretty annoying, and the comic bits are, well, perhaps not for everyone.

#1: To Run and Hide

The Academy has made its view of Doc’s midlife-crisis episodes known, and it is that they stink. Still a few more to come, though.

As always, here is our family’s full aggregated rankings.

1. “I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Away”
2. The Wolves
3. The Handyman
4. “My Ellen”
5. “Here Come the Brides”
6. Whisper Country
7. Times of Change
8. The Stranger
9. “Be My Friend”
10. The Fighter
11. Freedom Flight
12. A Most Precious Gift
13. The High Cost of Being Right
14. “I Remember, I Remember”
15. Castoffs
16. The Rivals
17. The Aftermath
18. The Inheritance
19. The Creeper of Walnut Grove
20. “Meet Me at the Fair”
21. To Run and Hide

And that’s that! Hope you enjoyed the show – I know I did – and I can’t wait to see you again for Season Five. Dags and I are going on vacation next week, so there may be a bit of a hiatus before we return. In the meantime, thanks so much for reading.

UP NEXT: “As Long as We’re Together,” Part One