“May We Make Them Proud” (Part Two)

The Nineteenth-Century Betty Hazelden; or Nellie, You’re Letting This Place Go to the Dogs (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “May We Make Them Proud” [sic] Airdate: February 4, 1980 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY: Mary has lost her marbles with grief, so the show locks her in a hotel room to focusContinue reading ““May We Make Them Proud” (Part Two)”

“May We Make Them Proud” (Part One)

“She’ll Be Fine”; or Mary’s Baby Was Ugly . . . But Not Too Ugly to Live! (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “May We Make Them Proud” [sic] Airdate: February 4, 1980 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: [screams uncontrollably] RECAP: We live in bad times, everybody. We’re down inContinue reading ““May We Make Them Proud” (Part One)”

Mortal Mission

Much Ado About Mutton; or Selling Poison Meat to Blind Orphans? What Kind of Show Is This? (a recap by Will Kaiser – Menz Weekend edition) Title: Mortal Mission Airdate: March 12, 1979 Written by John T. Dugan Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Half the town nearly dies of anthrax, andContinue reading “Mortal Mission”

The Enchanted Cottage

Always Look On the Bright Side of Life; or Stupid Mary Rides Again (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Enchanted Cottage Airdate: February 26, 1979 Written by Don Balluck Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Mary can see again! Actually, no she can’t.  In other business, Michael Landon’s infatuation with theContinue reading “The Enchanted Cottage”

The Godsister

Far From Heaven; or How Do You Solve a Problem Like Carrie? (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Godsister Airdate: December 18, 1978 Written by Don Balluck Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Two Carries? Utter insanity! RECAP: [UPDATE: It’s occurred to me that at no point during this episode did anyContinue reading “The Godsister”

Blind Journey, Part Two

Joe Versus the Volcano; or “How Do I Look?” “Like You’re Gonna Kill a Baby and Alice Garvey, Now Go to Bed.” (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Blind Journey, Part Two Airdate: December 4, 1978 Written by John T. Dugan Story by Carole Raschella, Michael Raschella, and John T. Dugan Directed by William F.Continue reading “Blind Journey, Part Two”

Men Will Be Boys

Men II Boyz; or I Just Can’t Quit You, David Rose (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Men Will Be Boys Airdate: November 13, 1978 Written by Don Balluck Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: As a prank/lesson, Charles and Garvey send their sons on a camping adventure; but they’re the onesContinue reading “Men Will Be Boys”

A Most Precious Gift

The Birds and The Beads; or Mistress Mary, She-Wolf of Hero Township (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: A Most Precious Gift Airdate: February 27, 1978 Written by Carole and Michael Raschella  Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Ma becomes pregnant, but quickly spirals into prenatal depression and paranoia. Meanwhile, the Bead hasContinue reading “A Most Precious Gift”

“Be My Friend”

Creek to Nowhere; or They Wouldn’t Just Give it to Some Rando Jezebel (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “Be My Friend” [sic] Airdate: January 30, 1978 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Tortured by her insane dad, a sad girl abandons her baby; but TV’s most meddlesome father/daughter duo intervenes.Continue reading ““Be My Friend””

Whisper Country

What the Fuck Country (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Whisper Country Airdate: January 16, 1978 Written by John Hawkins Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Deeply weird even by this show’s standards, this one is a strange tale of witch vs bitch. RECAP: First off, I’m very happy to announce that ourContinue reading “Whisper Country”