The King is Dead

Milo Meatloaf; or Charles’s Head is Disappearing Into His Hair (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The King is Dead Airdate: November 12, 1979 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: It’s a clash of the titans when amateur wrestler Jonathan Garvey turns pro. RECAP: First things first, very sad to hearContinue reading “The King is Dead”

The Return of Mr. Edwards

The California Ibex; or Old Dan Fuck Yourself (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Return of Mr. Edwards Airdate: November 5, 1979 Written by Arthur Heinemann Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: A beloved comic-relief character returns to this heartwarming family show and immediately attempts suicide. RECAP:  RAJA: You guys have aContinue reading “The Return of Mr. Edwards”

The Halloween Dream

Son of Mustache Man!; or You Give Ugg a Bad Name (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Halloween Dream Airdate: October 29, 1979 Written and directed by Michael Landon EDITOR’S NOTE: Literally everything about this episode is offensive. (Well, almost.) SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: In what’s regarded by many as the worst Little HouseContinue reading “The Halloween Dream”

“Back to School,” Part One

Love is a Manly Splendored Thing; or Flippin’ Awesome (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “Back to School” [sic], Part One Airdate: September 17, 1979 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Walnut Grove experiences an outbreak of immortal TV moments when a grown man named Almanzo Wilder comes to town. RECAP:Continue reading ““Back to School,” Part One”

EXTRA: The 1979 Walnut Groovy Awards

Well, it’s that time of year again, when I trudge down to our basement and try to find some memorabilia from the Walnut Groovy Awards. (You may recall the WGA was a ceremony held annually at the Thunderbird Minneapolis Hotel that recognized Little House’s best – and not-so-best – episodes, performances, music, memorable moments, andContinue reading “EXTRA: The 1979 Walnut Groovy Awards”

“Someone Please Love Me”

She Want That Cookie Real Bad; or At Least She Doesn’t Have to Worry About Internet Brain Rot and AI (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “Someone Please Love Me” [sic] Airdate: March 5, 1979 Written by Michael Landon Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: In this Chuck-only episode, Charles ignites lust inContinue reading ““Someone Please Love Me””

There’s No Place Like Home, Part Two

A Winner Don’t Quit on Themselves, Mr. Hanson; or Little House: The Final Yourney (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: There’s No Place Like Home, Part Two Airdate: October 16, 1978 Written by Michael Landon Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: The three families return to Walnut Grove to find Mr. HansonContinue reading “There’s No Place Like Home, Part Two”

There’s No Place Like Home, Part One

Noe Country for Old Men; or You Gotta Noe When to Fold ’Em (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: There’s No Place Like Home, Part One Airdate: October 9, 1978 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: A fool named Toby Noe and his money are soon parted. Ma gives Laura anContinue reading “There’s No Place Like Home, Part One”

The Man Inside

La Bohèmoth; or We Should Never Make Unkind Remarks About Anyone (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Man Inside Airdate: October 2, 1978 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: A new classmate of Laura’s is ashamed of her father because of his size. RECAP: Oh boy, this one I haveContinue reading “The Man Inside”

“As Long as We’re Together,” Part Two

I’m a Farmer, Not a Fighter; or My Birds Seem More Dainty (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “As Long as We’re Together” [sic], Part Two Airdate: September 18, 1978 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: The Grovester moms start a school. Ma and Pa enjoy Alone Time. Albert commits pettyContinue reading ““As Long as We’re Together,” Part Two”