Alfred Hitchcock Presents (TV series)

“Whatever Happened to the Class of ’56”

The Big Chill, Walnut Grove-Style; or The Name’s Charles Ingalls, Motherfucker (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “Whatever Happened to the Class of ’56” [sic] Airdate: January 14, 1980 Written by John T. Dugan Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Where do I begin? The Midwest regional Grange meeting in Milwaukee has overlapped withContinue reading ““Whatever Happened to the Class of ’56””

The Werewolf of Walnut Grove

Eliza Jane Triumphant; or What Can You Write About the Sky? (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Werewolf of Walnut Grove Airdate: January 7, 1980 Written by John T. Dugan Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: In this very odd mélange of previous story elements, Laura and Albert pull a supernaturalContinue reading “The Werewolf of Walnut Grove”

The Angry Heart

Yes, Virginia, Our Grandson is an Asshole; or Hester-Sue Would Rock the Shit Out of This Song (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Angry Heart Airdate: December 17, 1979 Written by Del Reisman Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Therapy Charles has to cure a guy who’s addicted to beating up hisContinue reading “The Angry Heart”

Crossed Connections

When Harry Met Allie; or Girls Just Want to Have Phone (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Crossed Connections Airdate: December 10, 1979 Written by Don Balluck Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Scandal rocks Hero Township when switchboard operator Mrs. Oleson learns a Grovester’s dark secret. (I won’t tell you who itContinue reading “Crossed Connections”

The Faith Healer

The Banality of Evil; or Total Eclipse of the Appendix (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Faith Healer Airdate: November 19, 1979 Written by Don Balluck Directed by Maury Dexter SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Another Reverend Alden one. This time, Dabbs gets to flex his acting muscles when Aldi is challenged by a rivalContinue reading “The Faith Healer”

Annabelle

Nels Into Darkness; or The Flying Zaldamos (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Annabelle Airdate: October 15, 1979 Written by Del Reisman Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: It’s another tale of fat-shaming, cruelty, and soul-sickness as Nels’s estranged sister comes to town . . . with the circus. [UPDATE: It cameContinue reading “Annabelle”

The Family Tree

Pin a Heart-Shaped Apron to Your Boobs, You’re Sure to Get a Husband; or Walnut Steamy? (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Family Tree Airdate: October 1, 1979 Written by Vincent R. Gutierrez Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: When his biological father surfaces, Albert devises a twisted strategy to getContinue reading “The Family Tree”

The Sound of Children

What Could Go Wrong?; or Notice It’s Not “The SIGHT of Children” (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Sound of Children Airdate: February 5, 1979 Written by Carole and Michael Raschella Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Depressing One Alert. Mary and Adam experience the first tragedy in their attempts toContinue reading “The Sound of Children”

“Dance With Me”

Oh Noes!!; or Pa’s Chest is the Perfect Roast-Chicken Color (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “Dance With Me” [sic] Airdate: January 22, 1979 Written by Paul Wolff Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Toby Noe is captured and extradited to Walnut Grove, where he falls in love. RECAP: No time for aContinue reading ““Dance With Me””

The Craftsman

This Might Be the Oldest Person Charles Has Ever Been Fatherly To; or The Acorn Doesn’t Fall Far From the Tree? (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Craftsman Airdate: January 8, 1979 Written by Paul Wolff Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Another Albert one: This time, he apprentices to an aphorism-spoutingContinue reading “The Craftsman”