The Halloween Dream

Son of Mustache Man!; or You Give Ugg a Bad Name (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Halloween Dream Airdate: October 29, 1979 Written and directed by Michael Landon EDITOR’S NOTE: Literally everything about this episode is offensive. (Well, almost.) SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: In what’s regarded by many as the worst Little HouseContinue reading “The Halloween Dream”

The Family Tree

Pin a Heart-Shaped Apron to Your Boobs, You’re Sure to Get a Husband; or Walnut Steamy? (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Family Tree Airdate: October 1, 1979 Written by Vincent R. Gutierrez Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: When his biological father surfaces, Albert devises a twisted strategy to getContinue reading “The Family Tree”

“Someone Please Love Me”

She Want That Cookie Real Bad; or At Least She Doesn’t Have to Worry About Internet Brain Rot and AI (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “Someone Please Love Me” [sic] Airdate: March 5, 1979 Written by Michael Landon Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: In this Chuck-only episode, Charles ignites lust inContinue reading ““Someone Please Love Me””

Blind Journey, Part Two

Joe Versus the Volcano; or “How Do I Look?” “Like You’re Gonna Kill a Baby and Alice Garvey, Now Go to Bed.” (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Blind Journey, Part Two Airdate: December 4, 1978 Written by John T. Dugan Story by Carole Raschella, Michael Raschella, and John T. Dugan Directed by William F.Continue reading “Blind Journey, Part Two”

“I Remember, I Remember”

Caroline Ingalls, Piece of Work; or Did He Make That Out of Rabbit Poop? (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “I Remember, I Remember” [sic] Airdate: January 23, 1978 Written by Arthur Heinemann Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: On her wedding anniversary, Caroline recalls the days when Charles was played byContinue reading ““I Remember, I Remember””

The Aftermath

Solomon Wept; or The Calamitous Return of Cap’m Beadle (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Aftermath Airdate: November 7, 1977 Written by Don Balluck Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Two murderers on the run come to town and hire Mary, who’s revealed to be a Confederate sympathizer, as a servant.Continue reading “The Aftermath”

To Run and Hide

Where the Buffalos Bone; or The Man Who Let Ernie Kovacs Die (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: To Run and Hide Airdate: October 31, 1977 Written by John T. Dugan Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Doc Baker Kills Another One™ and suffers a nervous breakdown. Meanwhile, Mrs. Oleson begins seeing hisContinue reading “To Run and Hide”

Little Women

Bonnets Expand Toward the Sun; or A Gelfling Alive? (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Little Women Airdate: January 24, 1977 Written by Dale Eunson and B.W. Sandefur Story by Dale Eunson Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Nellie organizes a scene from Little Women as a school play, but an actor’sContinue reading “Little Women”