“Author! Author!”

I Call Cash On the Bullshit; or “Awful! Awful!” (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “Author! Author!” [sic] Airdate: November 26, 1979 Written by Carole and Michael Raschella Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: In a shocking twist, Grandma Holbrook suddenly dies! Then, in a boring twist, Charles helps her husband publishContinue reading ““Author! Author!””

The King is Dead

Milo Meatloaf; or Charles’s Head is Disappearing Into His Hair (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The King is Dead Airdate: November 12, 1979 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: It’s a clash of the titans when amateur wrestler Jonathan Garvey turns pro. RECAP: First things first, very sad to hearContinue reading “The King is Dead”

“Someone Please Love Me”

She Want That Cookie Real Bad; or At Least She Doesn’t Have to Worry About Internet Brain Rot and AI (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “Someone Please Love Me” [sic] Airdate: March 5, 1979 Written by Michael Landon Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: In this Chuck-only episode, Charles ignites lust inContinue reading ““Someone Please Love Me””

“Dance With Me”

Oh Noes!!; or Pa’s Chest is the Perfect Roast-Chicken Color (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “Dance With Me” [sic] Airdate: January 22, 1979 Written by Paul Wolff Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Toby Noe is captured and extradited to Walnut Grove, where he falls in love. RECAP: No time for aContinue reading ““Dance With Me””

Blind Journey, Part One

Whoa, We’re Halfway There; or When Ames the Heart (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Blind Journey, Part One Airdate: November 27, 1978 Written by John T. Dugan Story by Carole Raschella, Michael Raschella, and John T. Dugan Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: RECAP: ROMAN: Sixteen-plus??? What’s happened to this showContinue reading “Blind Journey, Part One”

The Wedding

“I’ll Be Waving as You Drive Back Into Town for Our Wedding”; or Stupid Mary’s Revenge (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Wedding Airdate: November 6, 1978 Written by Arthur Heinemann Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Mary gets married, but not before having a royal freakout. RECAP: Welcome to our 100thContinue reading “The Wedding”

The Man Inside

La Bohèmoth; or We Should Never Make Unkind Remarks About Anyone (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Man Inside Airdate: October 2, 1978 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: A new classmate of Laura’s is ashamed of her father because of his size. RECAP: Oh boy, this one I haveContinue reading “The Man Inside”

“As Long as We’re Together,” Part Two

I’m a Farmer, Not a Fighter; or My Birds Seem More Dainty (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “As Long as We’re Together” [sic], Part Two Airdate: September 18, 1978 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: The Grovester moms start a school. Ma and Pa enjoy Alone Time. Albert commits pettyContinue reading ““As Long as We’re Together,” Part Two”

“As Long as We’re Together,” Part One

“Oh, Damn!”; In Which Will’s Singing Voice is Revealed (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “As Long as We’re Together” [sic], Part One Airdate: September 11, 1978 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: After moving to Winoka, Carrie begins using profanity and urinating on the ground. Oh, and Anne Ramsey andContinue reading ““As Long as We’re Together,” Part One”

The Fighter

The Strongest Smaller Person in Walnut Grove; or You Know, I’ve Never Been With a Black Man Before (a recap by Will Kaiser) EDITOR’S WARNING: This episode contains racist language and images of (barely) covered human penises. Thank you. Title: The Fighter Airdate: November 21, 1977 Written by Michael Landon Story by Lawrence M. KonnerContinue reading “The Fighter”