The Halloween Dream

Son of Mustache Man!; or You Give Ugg a Bad Name (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: The Halloween Dream Airdate: October 29, 1979 Written and directed by Michael Landon EDITOR’S NOTE: Literally everything about this episode is offensive. (Well, almost.) SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: In what’s regarded by many as the worst Little HouseContinue reading “The Halloween Dream”

Annabelle

Nels Into Darkness; or The Flying Zaldamos (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: Annabelle Airdate: October 15, 1979 Written by Del Reisman Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: It’s another tale of fat-shaming, cruelty, and soul-sickness as Nels’s estranged sister comes to town . . . with the circus. [UPDATE: It cameContinue reading “Annabelle”

Mortal Mission

Much Ado About Mutton; or Selling Poison Meat to Blind Orphans? What Kind of Show Is This? (a recap by Will Kaiser – Menz Weekend edition) Title: Mortal Mission Airdate: March 12, 1979 Written by John T. Dugan Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Half the town nearly dies of anthrax, andContinue reading “Mortal Mission”

“Be My Friend”

Creek to Nowhere; or They Wouldn’t Just Give it to Some Rando Jezebel (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: “Be My Friend” [sic] Airdate: January 30, 1978 Written and directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Tortured by her insane dad, a sad girl abandons her baby; but TV’s most meddlesome father/daughter duo intervenes.Continue reading ““Be My Friend””

The Wolves

Abandoned Dog-ters; or There is a Lot of Dog Genitalia in This One (a recap by Will Kaiser) EDITOR’S NOTE: This recap is rated 13+ for tasteless observations. Be warned. Title: The Wolves Airdate: October 17, 1977 Written by Lawrence M. Konner Directed by Michael Landon SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: It’s a bloodbath when madContinue reading “The Wolves”

To Live With Fear: Part Two

To Live With Disappointment; or Charles Ingalls and the Temple of Doom (a recap by Will Kaiser) Title: To Live With Fear, Part Two Airdate: February 21, 1977 Written by John Hawkins Directed by William F. Claxton SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Mary’s life hangs by a thread, but instead of worrying about that, wouldn’t youContinue reading “To Live With Fear: Part Two”

Quarantine

A Nightmare in Elmsville; or How Many Poison-Ivy Pandemics Can One Town Bear? (a recap by Will Kaiser) TITLE: Quarantine AIRDATE: January 17, 1977 Written by John Hawkins Directed by Victor French SUMMARY IN A NUTSHELL: Southwest Minnesota reels from a twin outbreak of mountain fever and poison ivy. RECAP: We watched this episode outContinue reading “Quarantine”

“I’ll Ride the Wind”

“‘I’ll Break the Wind’”; or  How Good are You at Milking, Mary? (a recap by Will Kaiser) TITLE: “I’ll Ride the Wind” [sic] AIRDATE: January 10, 1977 Written by Harold Swanton Directed by William F. Claxton EDITOR’S WARNING: This recap is rated 13+ for more tasteless commentary than usual. Reader discretion is advised. (Even better,Continue reading ““I’ll Ride the Wind””